Jono was trained by a seven foot tall deaf Navajo Indian named Crying Bull.  He would play complex classical bass pieces while standing on serrated glass shards and recieving a barage of agonizing kicks to the groin. The intense training brought his bass playing to an unbelievable level of expertise, but at the same time created a dark side to him... A side that doesn't tolerate overly flamboyant losers like Andrew Bergee, or disgusting Euro trash like Pamala Helgeson. That rage of his explains his unique style of playing. As for how Kevin manages to sing like an angel, that's none of your God damn business.

Where can I get my very own Jono and The Glass T-shirt?

Jono found a reliable place that makes pretty high quality custom shirts for cheap.  But due to internal conflicts in the band, we almost certainly won't be following through on the 15 orders that we would need to make in order to get a reasonable deal out of the purchase.  If you really want one now, go to the custom shirt store in the Maplewood mall, (I think it's called My Favorite T-shirt)  and ask them to look up Jono Beaver in their directory.  If they still have the design, you can purchase a very high quality shirt for a very high price.  (around $20)

Why did you add an entire section on this site about the movie only hours after explaining that you wouldn't?

......

Whatever happened to Adam as the second guitarist?

The movie will answer that question, along with countless other ones.  In contrast, watching Andrew Bergee's movie will result in temporary blindness, followed by the viewer contracting the clap, as well as several other STD's.

Will I ever be able to read the band's current and/or old lyrics?

The old ones were all written in a notebook that Jono decided to throw away. (I know, he's a bastard) After looking around for a while, I was able to find most of the sheets of paper that I wrote the original lyrics/ideas on, and also a few songs that even Jono probably hasn't seen or possibly even heard of before.  I'll try to post them a little later.  I'm also still deciding on how to go about posting our very earliest lyrics...

Is what you're filming more of a movie, documentary, or another type of video production that I can't currently name, or even think of for some reason?

It's hard to give a classification to what has been filmed... One person (who will go nameless) went so far as to call it a Shock-u-mentary.  Unfortunately, the act of that person using that awful "word" to describe something as brilliant as what we are creating landed him a spot right near the top of the "List."

So far, the only classification to what we are working on that has been up to my standards has simply been "The movie"

The Rolling Stones have been around for about 50 years, and only have a handful of good songs to show for it.  Your band was started less than a year ago, and every song that you guys have done so far has kicked ass.  How long does it usually take you guys to write your songs?

Correction: The Rolling Stones don't have ANY good songs.  Everyone knows that.  Anyway, it usually takes us between 5 and 90 seconds to write most of our songs.